No it wasn't me. I am interested to see what Dr. H has to say to Markos about saving money though when that is available. Was this along the same lines?

No it wasn't, but I have markos show in my notes.

I don't know what I missed but I had your name down for the 8-23 show. I obviously had the wrong name. I knew it wasn't you because the BH ended up having an affair and that's why I was so confused, but

Now I wonder whose show I noted???

Here it is.
Radio Clip

maybe it was for FindingTheLight ?

I think there needs to be a moratorium on new usernames that start with F - you guys all look alike to me!

(Could be worse - there's been several dozen hopes and phoenixes.)

If you want to make a really romantic statement, you should use ceramic tile!

We'll do that in the new house. We are just trying to get this one ready to sell.

I believe I made a huge love bank deposit buying vinyl tile last year.

Although now that I think about it, we bought some ceramic tile, too.

I see you figured it out. I just got a chance to click on the link when I got home and I recognized the story.

Yes thanks to markos help.

Well, her needs list has changed. It is now:

1. FC
2. RC
3. FS
4. DS
5. AD

I'm not sure what to think about that but that's what it is at this point in time. I guess I need to rearrange what I have been doing.

As for UA time, this past week we got 13 out of the home and another 5 at home. So that's 18. It was a struggle this week because our youngest got up in the middle of the night every day last week.

This week, we have the same thing scheduled. We'll see how it goes.

FTF,

Except for AD, all things OM could/would not supply.

From the descriptions you gave it sounds like OMs waning interest in sex with your W must have been painful for her, so I'm not sure she even got AD from OM.

God Bless
Gamma

If that's the case, then how could she be "in love" with him?

I believe the standard response would be that she is not interested in having her more intimate emotional needs met by me at this time which explains the lack of them on the current list. (IC, AF, SF)

Interesting that family commitment now tops the list - one of the most important things I could do for Prisca when she was withdrawn was to arrange family activities. Usually having a good time as a family was a good way to start breaking the ice.

Do you guys schedule 15 hours a week for family commitment?

We don't really schedule it. It's a given we will be with them every evening and we usually do something on Saturday or Sunday or both. This past Saturday we went to Chuck e Cheese because the local festival we had planned on going to got rained out.

Those sound good - you might quietly measure the time involved and see how many hours are really being spent.

Just got through reading mywifeilove's thread from 6 or 7 years ago. It was a really interesting and inspiring story.

Just got me thinking about my own R with my W and realizing we are no where near where they ended up yet. If you haven't read it and have the time, it is an interesting read but a long thread. In a nutshell, his W had an affair, moved out, and he was able to do a long but great Plan A, and then a rather short Plan B at the end to win her back.

It almost seemed to me that they had to go through that process to reconnect and come out together on the other end.

I was just thinking on my own situation and how I handled things after D-Day up until today and wonder if I didn't do it all wrong.

i think maybe my wife harbors a lot of resentment about the way I reacted and may have a lot to do with why she isn't really on board with MB even. I think she sees it as a way for me to control her. Not sure how to re-frame this whole thing into something we are doing TOGETHER because we both want to, not because I'm making her do it.

Does that make sense?

Whoops, wrong thread. Disregard.

FtheF:
Are you saying if you had "done it differently" FC might harbour less resentment? Or she might be more on board with MB program?

That actually sounds a bit manipulative/controlling to me. You can only control YOU. She controls her actions.

But then, I haven't read the thread you are referring to yet. Maybe I will feel differently once I do.

If making more deposits than withdrawals is "manipulative," then yeah.

You better believe that we can "manipulate" our spouses by making large, consistent Love Bank balances and avoiding withdrawals. We can "manipulate" them into falling in Love with us!