Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our discussion forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 7 of 22 1 2 5 6 7 8 9 21 22
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted By: Jedi_Knight
[

Cheaterville normally posts within 12 hours. They also have a link to anonymously email the exposed report from Cheaterville.


That's great! I wasn't aware of this!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227

hi guys, i just wanna know in advance of any possible consequences that i post OW's info on cheater websites. I already posted info, waiting for approval. Only facts posted. I have two kids, and custody issues i'm concerned. So i want to know what i'm doing here.

Questions:

1) Is it only OW could sue me if she wants to? Because she's not in the states, could my WH or her other friend here help her sue me? I'm just asking, and i know she might not likely have the guts to sue me, but just to cover bases.

2) what will i be facing if she sues me? i only post facts. then i guess she could apply for restraining order, court order to remove the post, fines, anything else?

3) if it goes to court, is it all the party involved need to testify, including me? just want to know.

4) anything else i need to be careful about?

Thanks a lot for all your help!


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Only the OW could try to sue you. But in the US, the truth is a defense to slander, libel. If the story is true, she has no grounds for a lawsuit. You should be aware that almost ALL waywards threaten to sue when you expose them but I have never seen one follow through. The reason is because THEY have more to lose if such a case ever got to court because you would be able to subpeona their emails and other private corresponce. This would all become a record in the court of law. It would INCREASE the exposure of their affair and they don't want that.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
What could she sue you for? Certainly not defamation, slander, or libel. Even if she tried, the truth is a defense. You didn't lie. She only calls attention to herself by going that route. I say let her. Better for your cause. If she DOES try to sue (because anybody can file a lawsuit) you could try and countersue (not likely that you would win either though).

If she does, she'll have to prove her case. She doesn't have a case.

Last edited by princessmeggy; 03/28/14 01:06 PM. Reason: typo

Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists. Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Originally Posted By: xpbrain1



1) Is it only OW could sue me if she wants to? Because she's not in the states, could my WH or her other friend here help her sue me? I'm just asking, and i know she might not likely have the guts to sue me, but just to cover bases.


What could she sue you for? There is no law against telling the truth or even opinions of others.

Originally Posted By: xpbrain1


2) what will i be facing if she sues me? i only post facts. then i guess she could apply for restraining order, court order to remove the post, fines, anything else?



Again, have you done anything illegal? Did you threaten to kill her? Because if you did that would justify a restraining order. Did you expose her affair? That's called telling the truth.

Have you watched the TV Show Cheaters? They expose affairs all the time. In fact, some newspapers specialize in just exposing affairs. If it was illegal than they would all be imprisoned.

Originally Posted By: xpbrain1


3) if it goes to court, is it all the party involved need to testify, including me? just want to know.



If exposing affairs was illegal, then wouldn't President Clinton have ordered Linda Tripp to be imprisoned for exposing his affair with Monica Lewinski? Think about that: If the President of the USA, or a high ranking military General can't stop affair exposure then why on earth do you suspect that somebody 10,000 miles away in a foreign country will fly here, file a lawsuit against you and have you prosecuted for telling the truth?

Originally Posted By: xpbrain1


4) anything else i need to be careful about?

Thanks a lot for all your help!


I think you need to focus on not being so afraid of telling the truth and exposing bad behavior.

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
If that hoe threatens to sue you, I would encourage her to do so!

OW: I am going to sue you for putting that on the internet!!

xpbrain: I would encourage you to do so because we could get all your emails, phone records and private correspondence subpoenaed into court. In the US the truth is a defense to libel. I would be delighted to get the truth out in the open in a court of law in the US and made a matter of record.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
If you really want to rile her feathers, write a letter to her family members, especially the older ones (in Chinese...have a student do it for you):

I wish to inform you that XXXXX has been having sleeping in her bed with my husband.
She dishonors my family and shows disrespect to my marriage.
I told everyone I know about this and they ask me, "Are all women in China like this?"
I answer, "I do not know. But she brings great shame and dishonor to her family and people."
I have posted her picture on Cheaterville. You can read about her here: (web address).

---------

If she is from a rural area, send a copy of it to the local government official also....and a few neighbors.

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted By: Jedi_Knight
If you really want to rile her feathers, write a letter to her family members, especially the older ones (in Chinese...have a student do it for you):

I wish to inform you that XXXXX has been having sleeping in her bed with my husband.
She dishonors my family and shows disrespect to my marriage.
I told everyone I know about this and they ask me, "Are all women in China like this?"
I answer, "I do not know. But she brings great shame and dishonor to her family and people."
I have posted her picture on Cheaterville. You can read about her here: (web address).

---------

If she is from a rural area, send a copy of it to the local government official also....and a few neighbors.


rotflmao rotflmao I just spewed Pepsi all over my screen!! rotflmao


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
thank you guys! i only stated facts, no threatening to kill her or anything stupid. but description of my post at cheaterville got deleted during approval process. Probably because i also translated the description into Chinese for them to read. also might because i stated which city she lives in right now.


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,272
Likes: 2
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,272
Likes: 2
Good job xp!!!


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Originally Posted By: xpbrain1
thank you guys! i only stated facts, no threatening to kill her or anything stupid. but description of my post at cheaterville got deleted during approval process. Probably because i also translated the description into Chinese for them to read. also might because i stated which city she lives in right now.


They usually let you post cities.
My post was initially deleted too; I think most people have to submit a couple times before its approved.

Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
so make it invisible and submit a new one?


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
i know this is my best chance of kill the affair right now. if this A drags on, neither WH or I would have any love to each other. Now I think we have each other, esp my WH wishes to divorce me asap, not even care about the kids anymore. but after go through all these, like posting on the internet, which might seem very extreme to others, will it make WH get scared of me and never want to reconcile? I know A will ruin marriage, not exposing it. but just WH's reaction right now gives me little hope.


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
I think i saw your post on Cheaterville but it says she lives in Hawaii? I thought she was in China?

Is that your post? a picture of her with the heading "she slept with my husband when I was pregnant"?

Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
yeah, that's the one. they deleted my description.

there is no choice of china, other than us, canada, uk and another country.


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
xpbrain, when they post it on the 2nd site, I would start emailing the links around to the OW, your H and as many contacts of the OW as possible.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
X
Member
OP Offline
Member
X
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 227
sent OW and contacts the link. she's like i already give up why r u still doing all this out of hate and revenge? your husband will get crazy because of what you did, and you guys can never get reconciled. she's still worry so much about my WH and my relationship....

feel exhausted.


Me: BW, 36; WH: 37
Married 14 years
DD: 4yr, DS: 8 month
DD: 11/24/2013
Plan A (not properly done) since DD. Exposure to OW's friend and work on 03/25/2014. Lots of LBs.
Plan B (w/ MIL lives w/ me): started 4/4/2014. Exposed WH to most of our friends in early 05/2014.
Plan A before moving to CA as suggested by Dr Harley started 6/8/14.
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted By: xpbrain1
sent OW and contacts the link. she's like i already give up why r u still doing all this out of hate and revenge? your husband will get crazy because of what you did, and you guys can never get reconciled. she's still worry so much about my WH and my relationship....


rotflmao


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
The homewrecker is just sooo "concerned" about your marriage! rotflmao


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,272
Likes: 2
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,272
Likes: 2
Originally Posted By: MelodyLane
The homewrecker is just sooo "concerned" about your marriage! rotflmao

Right?

She's so worried exposure is going to make your WH crazy? Waywards aren't very smart are they?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Page 7 of 22 1 2 5 6 7 8 9 21 22

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
1 members (1 invisible), 40 guests, and 85 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Lethabo, Livn1dayAtaTime, widup, Reggg, Endlessvow
71,682 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,528
Posts2,322,563
Members71,682
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2020, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.  |  Web Development by SunStar Media.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5