Remember u have two precious kids and they do CARE abt u! They love u, and u need to be strong for them. You are doing the right thing to fight for ur marriage. those ppl can have their opinion and u don't live for them. U live for urself! Keep ur chin up!

Thanks xpbrain for the support. I felt a bit better after I vented all that out. I just hate seeing anyone from his family and being made out to be the bad guy all the time. I just want someone to be on my side for a change you know?

That's very true xpbrain I don't live for them. I have to keep remembering that.

Screw em!

Where do you think they are headed with THAT moral compass?

To ToriSpellingVille...where a wistress can say things like this:


Totally missing the irony that this is exactly what she and her AP did to both their spouses 7 years ago. Seven years is a very long time in the world of A's, and even longer in Hollywood. I suspect that without the cameras, this would have imploded even sooner.

Sorry you felt badly about getting the cut direct. Don't let yourself dwell on it. It was just showing you that you need to move. And there is no need to even think about waiting 2 years to move. You can move while in PB, and under the circumstances I strongly encourage it.

And ending PB doesn't mean you must go back into C. If you have a time that you're ready to close the door to R, fine and dandy. But you can still stay NC for your own sanity - it's just to keep the drama out of your life at that point, not to preserve a $LB any longer. By that time, you would be making decisions based on what's best and most convenient for YOU.

In all your decisions from now on, even the one where WH comes crying and begging, make it with the best interests of you and the kids in mind. I hope that day is far enough in the future that you will be strong and glowing. No matter what you want to do, don't crumble!!! Because of the extreme cruelty you've endured, and the length of time you've endured it, you will need to set the bar even higher than you would've otherwise. And if he won't GLADLY jump, you walk away without looking back.

Most likely that will be a problem for another day, but I do want you to keep on building a mindset and habit of care and protection for yourself and the kids, so that you don't end up tempted to leave yourself defenseless again.

And start working toward moving. You need to be in a better place, and even if WH came back today, right this minute, you'd need to make moving an urgent priority. And all those silly IL's are just making it fast and easy for you to realize that you need them out of your life. Your new, A-free life doesn't just exclude WH's and OW's, but also AF's...Affair Friends. If someone is a friend of adultery, they are no friend of yours.

Have a fabulous day. Go paint some toenails.

I know Indie. I just can't believe that so many people just condone and enable this. A whole family of around 20-30 people!

So I think I need to just go shopping further away now so I am highly unlikely to run into anyone.

How's things with you?

Hi Neak

So I've had a think and I am still staying Plan B. I won't be going Plan C. Been there done that and it got me nowhere. So for the moment I am Plan B. This could change in the future to Plan D, but not yet. I have a date in mind that I at least want to do this. It is less than the 2 years. I will re-evaluate like Indie said at this date.

I did feel a bit better after that vent. I was 'Phew, I got that out'.

I do want to move. I can't keep living in this house. I need to get my settlement done so I can move so will deal with this when I return from my holiday. I can't wait to get away from all the drama and just concentrate on myself and my son.

If WH comes back the bar will definately be high. One which includes NC with OW, and following MB principles and posting with me here to make our marriage the best it has ever been.

And of course I will be transparent with my life and have no opposite sex friends.

And another thing will be him having to stick up for me to his family and defending me. I will be happy to patch things up with his family as long as he is willing to show them that I am his wife and that I come first to him.

Indie I'm up to Page 78 of your thread. You are one strong woman that's for sure!

Learning so much on here.

So after my meltdown today I started packing my son's and I suitcases for Canada. I got so much done and got me excited to go away. Took my mind off things which was good.

Big announcement what you've all been waiting for....I've chosen my new nail polish and buying tomorrow...researched online to find the perfect colour and name.

Colour: Bright pink.

And the name??? You're going to love this......

I'VE GOT THE POWER!!!

Rocksolid's going to be rocking!

p.s. Neak I used to like Tori back in 90210 days. But I don't like her so much anymore after what you wrote. I didn't know her and Dean were an affairage?

Is he an alcoholic or something?

All I heard recently is that they were swingers.

**edit**

I don't follow much of the HWood gossip. Since he was in rehab, obviously he has some kind of substance abuse problem. Swinging wouldn't surprise me, but I hadn't heard that before.

What I did know is they've been flaunting their adultery in front of the world for years, and now the world is watching an equally public breakup. Due to cheating.....go figure! I never woulda seen that one coming.

Your PINK sounds amazing. You do have the power!!!!!!

Just to clarify, I didn't think for a moment that you were going back into Plan C. You are Rocksolid Rockstar, not a waffle.

Thanks Neak. I appreciate you and everyone here steering me down the right path.

Annoys me when new people come and post mean spiteful comments but I will dust myself off from this and re group. I've owned everything I've done and will be a better person.

Thanks to my MB friends you all rock!

I didn't see the comment before it was deleted. I did notice that it was their first post. You so stirred someone that they signed up just to post to YOU!

There now, don't you feel better?

Apparently, Divinely Favored wasn't actually FAVORED by the divine. Or the mods. Might want to work on those personal assessment skills and self-image development.

tl

They basically said it serves me right that my WH had his affair and that OW is his saviour because I treated him so bad.

And that doing a 180 on him will just prove to him that I will walk out again.

Somebody has some learning to do.

Oh and that my WH doesn't have a voice anymore because I took it away from him when I had my own A.

Sorry rocksolid there are alot of people out there who condone infidelity.

Love the rockstar Pink nail polish!!

I might have thought all those things once upon a time. Thankfully, I know better now.