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Can you swing the online course? It costs $1000 and is your best bet. My H and I went through this in 2007 and we have an amazing marriage today. It takes a year to get through: they assign you a MB coach who works with you weekly in your lessons. You have daily access to Dr Harley.

ALSO, if you want to bring your wife here, notify the mods and ask if they will remove your thread. I can't speak for them but they have been known to do this in some cases.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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WD,
I am very happy to hear that you and your wife have made the turn around and are back in love again. Your faith was strong and it will be a rock for your marriage from now on.

Because you were so attentive to every aspect of Plan A, you were able to do something that few have before you: get your wife out of the fog quickly.

It helped that your wife turned to God. When my wife was in the fog she too turned to God, and he directed her back home also.

So glad to hear that she is reading Dr. Harley's books and you are doing the worksheets. Keep up the good work and keep up the 15 hours of UA per week.

God bless!


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Sir, you need to move if you want to recover your marriage

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I'm so glad to hear of your progress.

I'm hoping others will take inspiration from your thread. We have active threads now from posters who would serve themselves well by following your example!


Me 58: FWH (NC 32 yr), W 60, married 36 yr, DD 32
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I'm thrilled at the progress you've made based on exposure, Plan Aing and running off OM.

I'm very concerned though that there are some corners being cut. You can't follow the MB plans and other plans too because it's a very narrow path to recovery. I didn't see any reference to the love dare in your plan to kill the A so I'm not sure why you are following it now.

I can't say I know too much about the love dare except that people tend to show up here after trying it and they have terrible marriages. If it does indeed focus on unconditional love, you'll get yourself in a terrible pickle mixing the plans because MB is based around PoJA and these two concepts are polar opposites.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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The love dare for couples book is a daily read that focuses on bible scriptures, so I don't see it being a problem. We are going to do the MB course, since we have been reading Dr. Harleys books already.

I know Jedi wants me to move, however we can't move to another state, we do have children that have other parents.

My wife and I have been focusing on each others needs and we have been bonding and reconnecting with our love for one another greater than when we first met.

I'm in the driver seat with this, I can afford the 1000.00 for the MB course and it looks like there is a special being ran right now on it.

When I say we are bonding and reconnecting our love for one another is great, I can't even explain how great, it's like something I have never experienced in any relationship. I believe my strong faith in God is making a lot of this to happen. We have been spending almost every chance we can together and we both love it. The kids seem to be in better moods especially our son...


ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14

Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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Sir, you cannot recover if you don't move.
That is not my advice; that is Dr. Harley's advice

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Originally Posted by wifedivorcing
The love dare for couples book is a daily read that focuses on bible scriptures, so I don't see it being a problem. We are going to do the MB course, since we have been reading Dr. Harleys books already.
'

Awesome. I was worried you were using it as a replacement.

Quote
My wife and I have been focusing on each others needs and we have been bonding and reconnecting with our love for one another greater than when we first met.

And this is KEY. Dr Harley makes the point that if you don't create something BETTER than what you had before the affair, you are not in recovery.

Quote
I'm in the driver seat with this, I can afford the 1000.00 for the MB course and it looks like there is a special being ran right now on it.

This course saved my marriage. Many of us on the board went through it. MrW and MRsW, armymama, Papabear and many others. Those of us who went through it have great marriages that get better every year.

It is a blessing from God that you made it here. So very happy for you both!!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Hey WD...

Great update.

Can you shoot me an email. My address is below.

Mr. W


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
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WD,

What do you think about updating your username?

It just doesn't seem as though wife divorcing is the best description for you. (Yes, I know you still have a way to go and the outcome isn't guaranteed.).

We are hoping you will offer your support to other posters. Many of us are likely to point to you as an example of a cosmic plan A. Perhaps your handle could reflect your achievement rather than suggest a regrettable outcome.

I would suggest something recognizable to the many who have followed your journey. Perhaps keep the initials, "wife defender". Or perhaps describe you, "Motown Protector".

We are proud to call you a member of the MB community, and as wife divorcing you have become a bit of a legend. Maybe "WifeWasDivorcing".

With great respect, icgb.


Me 58: FWH (NC 32 yr), W 60, married 36 yr, DD 32
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Originally Posted by wifedivorcing
She did say it was wrong for me being in the hospital.

Is the any update on the involuntary hospitalization?

Just curious...if it is worth the fight.
Or if you are going to let it go. And think of it as one part of the path to get your marriage back.

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Originally Posted by ItCanGetBetter
I would suggest something recognizable to the many who have followed your journey. Perhaps keep the initials, "wife defender". Or perhaps describe you, "Motown Protector".

We are proud to call you a member of the MB community, and as wife divorcing you have become a bit of a legend. Maybe "WifeWasDivorcing". .


He could change it to Plan A King, it wouldnt be exaggeration!


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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I just wanted to check in with everyone, my wife and I our doing fantastic. I can only tell you that our marriage is so much greater than when we first married.

I'm sorry I have been gone for some time, we just needed to focus on us. I will give you an update very soon.

Last edited by wifedivorcing; 08/14/14 09:39 PM.

ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14

Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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Originally Posted by wifedivorcing
I just wanted to check in with everyone, my wife and I our doing fantastic. I can only tell you that our marriage is so much greater than when we first married.

I'm sorry I have been gone for some time, we just needed to focus on us. I will give you an update very soon.

Sir,
I'm glad to hear you are doing well.
However, you need to work on moving out of the state.
Are you doing this?

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So very glad to hear your good news.


Me 58: FWH (NC 32 yr), W 60, married 36 yr, DD 32
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Glad to hear it, WD. Look forward to hearing more.

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Originally Posted by wifedivorcing
I just wanted to check in with everyone, my wife and I our doing fantastic. I can only tell you that our marriage is so much greater than when we first married.

I'm sorry I have been gone for some time, we just needed to focus on us. I will give you an update very soon.
This is fantastic news. Come back soon to give us an update.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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You literally went through hell and back, through the wringer, etc.
Your story will be one to use for future posters

A true Marriage Builder warrior!!!


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Originally Posted by NebDane
You literally went through hell and back, through the wringer, etc.
Your story will be one to use for future posters

A true Marriage Builder warrior!!!
Totally agree with ^^^^


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Hey Warrior Buddy.

How are things going? It's been about 5 months since an update.

Did you and your Wife sign up for the online course?

I hope all is still well and continues to improve for both of you.

LTL

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