What do you mean your MAC? It goes on his cell phone and then you track it via a website.


Nononono, do not let him know! That completely defeats the purpose.

So what are your options?

You said your adult children moved with you. Can one of them drive you?

Nononono, do not let him know! That completely defeats the purpose.




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I am so ignorant and backward, must figure out a way to cancel this before he checks the crdit card online
I have never had a separate email
minor panic attack

I will have to start over again with surveillance, and continue with the exposure. I had to much going on all at once for Thanksgiving and was so eager to do get this done that I messed this up. Beating myself up any longer won't help; I need to sleep and eat so that I do not make such tactical and costly mistakes. I will continue with the exposure letters, which I write by hand, and get my own credit card from my account.
This cat-and-mouse business is a pathetic way to live. Trying to outsmart such cunning people with so little sleep will not work.

MD, I would get this done today; it is best to get it done all in a 48 hour window otherwise it has the effect of a trickle exposure. You don't need to hand write them. Send them via email, facebook or text.

What are you saying in your exposure letters?

My cover completely blown re: webwatchers, but they should give me a refund. My laptop too old to support it. He's been watching me like a hawk for awhile now.

I think I need to create a private internet identity for myself. Make a private email account, learn how to cover my tracks. I've never had Facebook or anything like that.

The few letters I've sent were long, because I have no actual proof except written statements (which I at least took photos of on my phone and secured my phone) I described the situation and the grave for both parties professionally and said I love my husband - - asked if they have any influence to please help save my H going down the dark path. Sent photo of mugshot of OW's father to fancy status-conscious in-laws as proof. WH called his dad in front of me, and FIL praised him. MIL is a shrink; thought she'd be concerned but nope.

WH sullied my reputation far and wide, which is why I took such care in writing

he interrupted
cannot do anything when he's home

I describe the situation, tell the person that WH respects him and so do I. I ask for help not allowing WH to go down such a dark path and mention how my kids all need therapy now. I say how I love my husband and will work very hard repairing my side of the fence so that we can move past this and keep the family intact.

Or I describe the situation in which public resources were mis-used and my husband lost his career while OW gets to move upward into a situation requiring very strict ethics and boundaries. I describe the affair recovery therapy and meetings he has attended and work done to prevent this thus far. That I am eager to help him recover and not make the worst mistake of his life.

Can someone help with setting up a FB account so I don't do some stupid blunder again? (never had FB)

This is close to the ruse OW concocted to lure me to her other place. She would have WH hide before I got there. A rehearsed situation in which I would be accused of harassing and scaring a blind person (her [sighted] friend would say she saw me threatening the poor dear) cops would be called and I would be (hopefully) hysterical and thoroughly discredited, working in her favor in the divorce she wants to happen.

So for something like this, I mean to avoid something like this, would a PI be better?

RE: White Pages-- I got a new account and OW has scrubbed herself right off of there.

Just found out more lies. Found an email to craigslist for a one bedroom apartment (somewhere in our former city) sandwiched in between emails to realtor here in our new place. The explanation was, something about we weren't getting along and it was just in case. No clue how to find out if he rented something for those months before moving.
Have left two messages to the most accredited polygraph examiner who is somewhat local.
There are so many lies and odd coincidences (which I do not believe in). Need to think long and hard about a careful Plan B. I only have a small amount of money to spend on safety and security measures so I need to choose my battles wisely. I am dealing with an extremely motivated and polished secret life person.

Can you hire a PI to get all the goods? Are you getting ready for Plan B?

Hi BrainHurts! (First my apologies for mistaking your name upthread.)

Good question about a PI, which I'd do in a heartbeat if money were no object. But do I want to pay extra, when I will need some financial autonomy for a careful Plan B.
Undecided as yet.

I was set to drop $500 on a poly but I already *know* that I am being lied to and gaslighted by my husband. I thanked him for saving me the money which can be used for Christmas, because he is desperate to keep his nice iphone.

WH cannot explain the endless anomalies, says he does not know how to even use the phone's built-in features, or about deletions which require 3 steps to perform, cannot remember received [sketchy as you-know-what] phone calls, doesn't know how he dialed a google voice call, etc. etc. He really over-did it with the fake tech ignorance. Not to mention the AP has advanced surveillance/tech abilities and resources far beyond the average person, due to special circumstances.

Why would one be so desperate to keep a phone which is just too sophisticated to use, has applications that when accessed cannot be explained, records calls that did not happen, I asked. Why pay so much for a smartphone that reveals so much, but when it is used cannot be explained? What's the point if Find Friends is inaccurate? (which it's not; that's how I discovered some very important facts)

So, yes I am very very interested in Plan B.