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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 4
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 4 |
the OW is my H's co-worker. i've met her once at my kid's b-day party. i've called her after finding out about their affair. she denied anything ever happening. my H told me otherwise. she says she was never interested in him and that they were just really good friends.
H and OW still work together closely. they go out to dinner for business together with other people . i feel i need to meet her in person but am not sure what i should say. i know what i want to say but i am not sure if it is the best thing. i know that my H still has strong feeling about her and is still very attracted to her. i don't really know what her intentions were for having the A. my H is her boss. please help..
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
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Member
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733 |
mini,
Don't !. What is your purpose of confronting her ? what outcome do you expect ?
-RH-
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,190
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Member
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,190 |
Mini, I'm with Redhat. You might just drive your H right back into her arms.
If you really need to "vent"--write a letter expressing all your feelings and then immediately SHRED it! Do NOT send it to her.
It's important that you keep your dignity and don't allow this woman to further humiliate you. It's also important that your H can trust you (I know that seems unfair when it doesn't seem you can trust him but he DID admit the A to you, right?)
I'm sorry you have to go through this pain. You won't regret the decision to let this meeting with her pass you by. Guaranteed.
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 284
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 284 |
So, basically, the Affair is still going on, right? I know this sounds hard, but to really end an Affair, it has to be NO CONTACT - and that means your hubby needs another job. Hard choices and hard decisions. I'd say it's a safe bet that - no matter what BS they spout to you - the Affair is still ongoing, or it may flare up again now and then, but it's still alive! Can you begin Plan A or B - depending on where you and him are right now?
One last thought (with tongue-in-cheek) don't confront her on the "Jerry Springer Show"!
Good luck and God bless you both, Harold
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 49
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 49 |
Hi Mini.
I know what you mean about that you HAVE to do this. I had to also. I had to know EVERYTHING. Be careful what you wish for because you will be stuck with those images long after they are history to your H.
Sometimes, I wish that I hadn't met her, and didn't know every detail. They give you something to obsess about. They provide all of the triggers for pain everytime something familiar to that situation comes up.
Of course, if I had to do it all over again (no, no!!) I would probably have to know again.
Good luck,
PDD
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