Dear Elswick, (Reader Advisory: Contains explicit ideas)
It would be easier for me to keep track of our exchanges on this board, Other Topics, if that is OK with you.
To stay alert driving, when I am tired, I have learned about two accupuncture points to help stay alert. Pinching the ear lobe, with the tip of my thumb, against my curled index finger. Each side. I pinch as hard as I can stand it, for about 2 seconds, and release. The tip of my tounge is the other point, about a quarter to a half inch back from the tip. I bite gently with my teeth. I often twist the tip of my tounge upside down, and then put pressure near the tip, with my teeth. I don't bite down too hard, just enough to feel it.
When I am fatigued, and at a red light, I will put my car in park. If I drift too far, then slipping my foot off the brake has no consequences. If I do drift off, then I may hear the horn of the guy behind me.
That was the response to your posts, now I am mostly responding to the suggsestions you have already recieved, as I read those posts.
You are desiring to re-gain the love of your last ex-husband, now your landlord. The basic principle to increase affection is to increase communication and cooperation. It seems that you are avoiding love busters. It seems that you understand some of the principles of 180 Degree Divorce Busters.
180 Degree Divorce Buster Ideas Not going to your in-laws home is a good divorce buster. One Prime idea of divorce busters is to aviod pushing your spouse away. If you had gone to your In-laws home, your husband would have likely had uncomfortable feelings at times, about the expectations of his family members, for hiim to be affectionate toward you, particularly in your presence. How much you want to bet you get a hug when he gets back?
I don't know how to get you social security disability. I think it takes two concurrent disabilities. Is your narcolepsy related to your thyroid removal condition? If they are two separate conditions, then that might work. Did you have narcolepsy before the thyroid removal?
Maxx brings up a good point, that he lost his driver's license when he admitted having debilitating narcolepsy. Getting disability for narcolepsy may casue problems for you later on, Like losing your diriver's license and car insurance.
If you want free training, and free counseling, and a support group and a job, and help putting more affection back into your husband's feelings. There are at least some free courses at Dianetic Centers, but you may be able to arrange more help also.
Dianetics Home and Addresses Have you checked int0 the Salvaton Army programs? It is a lot easier to work to impprove a realtionship if you are living together. I know it hurts when your husband goes drinking. At least he comes home alone. Work with what you got. Have you ever suggested that you do something together in the evenings or weekends? What hours does he work? Practice some phrases here. "I really should go for a 1/2 hour walk. Can you come with me so I feel safe?" "Wouldn't you like to go see ______Movie" What kind of movies does he like? What kind of political, church or athletic activities does he like? Find a way to get tickets for a hockey game.
Serving your husband sweets, if he would prefer non-fat food, is devilish. I like certain kinds of food with some higher fat content. My wife cntinues to battle me, by sneaking in lower fat options. I don't mind dying, I just want to enjoy my like while I am here. My wife cuts the fat off steaks, and sneaks ground turkey meat into the hamburgers. I recommend serving him what he likes, rather than displeasing him with what is good for him.
Will your husband do any stretching exercises with you? Will he take a walk with you? Jog? Swim? Play tennis? Racketball? How good is the marital relations? One-half, Three-Quarters, seven-eighths? How can you make it overflowing? Do you believe that visual images can increase satiation? How do you employ images? How good is your muscle control? You want to be a personal trainer, how good are your massage skills? Are you familiar with the Alluvial Canal muscles on both sides of the back bone? Do you know how to do deep muscle massage by making a fist, and putting the knuckles into the musscles, and pressing your fist into the muscles with the palm of your other hand? Do you know how to place your thumb on one side of a vertebral disk, with your index finger on the otgher side, and squeeze gently, relieving the pressure on each disk up an down the cervical, thoracic and lumbar spine? So you know about massaging the muscles at the base of the skull? Do you have any massage instruction video tapes?
Esalen Massage Instruction Tapes I think it is reasonable to hope to get your husband's love back. You have quite a few things going for you. Of course it does not seem that way, with illness, unemployent and car wrecks. But I see hope, and I am willing to keep posting back with ideas to make that happen.
Recap:Divorced 7-28-03, Husband had promised to not divorce. Living conjugally together, wiithout hugs, hurt by H goes out drinking to bars. Having tough time with money. 4. Have narcolepsy and am hypothyroid (no insurance still)more cataplexy than anything. (My face and arm muscles always go numb during extreme stress),
Unemployed, wants non-drowsey job, maybe a personal trainer. Son going in Army. Daughter newly married with husband and child. Thyroid removed at start of marriage.
Post back where you want more details.
Quipper
Husband of 28 years, raised 2 challenging kids, stil strugling
<small>[ November 23, 2003, 07:44 AM: Message edited by: Quipper ]</small>