Hold, I see this as a great step forward. Yes, the info isn't great and hurts you. But recognizing the problem is about 90% of the work of fixing it, right?

That said, I don't know the answer to her problem, but encourage you to continue listening and being supportive. That will keep the lines of communication open. If she feels you are on her team, then she sees you as part of the solution, NOT part of the problem.

In the past, when I've tried to share with my husband WHY I'm not hot for him 24/7 like it was when we were dating and in the early days of marriage, he has shut me down with things like "that's ridiculous, married people should always be hot for each other" or "that's just an excuse" or "now you're trying to make me feel guilty for not having a job and you being exhausted" or...fill in the blank.

So guess who has stopped talking and started just stewing in resentment over it? And guess which aspect of our life it has continued to affect?

Keep on keeping on Hold. She is LUCKY she's got you as a supportive and loving husband. Even if you don't see yourself that way.