Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
It isn't a deal breaker for me, though. And that, I think, has always been the problem. It would take another affair or other abuse for it to be so. So how do I protect myself and my marriage when the other spouse does not put the same effort in that I do?

I think that is what I have been struggling with for a long time. Boundaries and consequences and trying to educate him. Though, I have given up most of that since I have no "plan".

The only thing that might help is the online program and we don't have the money for that.

I dont think the online program would help at all.